oh god the rape fog is back!
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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