I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
