If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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