You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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