Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
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