You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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