Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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