Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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