i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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