Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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