Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
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