The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush