butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
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