Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
