Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Randomize
