WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
