what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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