I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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