having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
