thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize