do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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