He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
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