I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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