If that was your dad, he is hot
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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