I wish I could teleport
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
