I'm drive I can fine osifer
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
