Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
