hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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