Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
