"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
