Don't you send me to vm
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
it's great music for shaving your balls
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Randomize