honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
