If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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