but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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