Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Randomize
