PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
