Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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