I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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