i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize