There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
