About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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