Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
