Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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