You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
In America we eat man semen.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize