quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
