yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Randomize