the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
