like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
