Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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