she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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