She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
