South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
