I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
