He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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